Some things are better off unknown.

True Story. Note to self ; Stop “stalking” you. More like checking up but , I need to stop. I read stuff that kind of hurts me. I start assuming things… Then, I don’t want to confront you because I don’t want to sound like a stalker or make you think that I don’t trust you.

I'm not ready.

Noted. Hey blogger:) I'm back. Lol , I was never gone. It's already the 27th today. I just wish that time could slow down somehow , in some special way. I'm not ready to end 2011 just yet. I'm not ready to go back to school. I'm not ready to stop seeing him as much as I do now which is actually not much too. But of course all my friends and family members have to constantly remind me how near school is. And to be really really honest? I'm not ready at all. Not one bit. LOL. I'm not even sure what am I suppose to do on the first day of school. What do I bring. Where do I go to. What teachers will I have. Who will be in my class. I'm pretty scared and worried. Point is , I'm not freaking prepared . Blargh , stress betul. Kay , I'll rant about life sucking some other time. Goodnight , signing out , bye!

Christmas:D

What's happening yo. I haven't been updating much lately , sorry for being lazy mah readurs. I had so much that I wanted to blog about but I forgot so let's just fill this post with whatever I have in my mind okay? okay ! :D Hmm well let's see , the only thing I remember QUITE clearly was how my christmas went. So yeah , On the 23rd in t afternoon my family and I + my bestfriend checked in @ t royal bintang hotel :D we ate and walked around and went for a swim. got our bean boozled from mr freestylez , thank you mr. freestylez. And we camwhored and played w it all night then had supper and went to bed. On the next day we had to wake up super early (well , for us) and changed room -.- after that she's t man was on the tv and I can't fall asleep anymore so I watched it :D Oh and the night before there was this never ending marathon of chalkzone & catdog. It was so annoying my gosh . HAHAHA basically did the same thing as what we did on t 23rd but it was fun-ner I guess? Took really really little pictures but it's okay. There's always next time. Watched a late night movie cause we had nothing to do. Mission impossible was awesome. Like seriously lah , I wanna watch it again. No jokeee. Somebodeh bring meeh? :D But the movie was kinda longer than others I think it was like 2 hours? LOL. Rushed to a toilet after that than we lost my brother. So t 3 of us split ways. But leeann was w me. Struggled to walk from e@curve to the other side of the street market , almost everyone was spraying snow on us. And that shit stinks. But I had fun anyways , so thats pretty much what I did on my christmas eve? For the christmas day itself , I spent it at home , laying on the couch. Redo-ing my nails and watching cds. No regrets:) That's all for now , toooooodles.

Just being emotional.

Relationship Killers ; Insecurity. Trust Issues. Jealousy. Lack of communication. Assumptions. Hoes. I never been this insecure with any guy before. So , why you? Gosh. I'm not supposed to be thinking like this. But I am , and I do , I keep thinking of what if's every time of the day. What if you get bored of me? I'm a pretty boring person once you get to know me. What if I'm not good enough? What if I'm not pretty enough? Have you seen the girls out there? They're freaking gorgeous. You're like surrounded by them and then there's me. What if she takes you back? Sometimes I feel like you're not fully over her. The way you talk about her and stuff. What if I leave? We'll hardly get to see each other. What if I'm not who you think I am? What if one day you wake up and think to yourself 'I can do sooo much better than her' ? People get tired of each other. It happens all the time :/ Distance doesn't ruin the relationship , doubts do. So why am I having them? Physically , Mentally and Emotionally tired. Don't mind me.

Sick.

Hi readers:) I spend my friday partying & drinking. Loljk , I spent most of my day in the toilet , vomiting. Today i went mint free , so I actually vomited alot. And from what I heard , you're suppose to feel better but I didn't. Everything I vomited was sweet instead of sour. And its covered w phlegm. Pretty gross huh?K , I should just probably shut up right now incase people reading this feel like vomiting. Mmhmm like I said in twitter my bestfriends made me cupcakes today , and they went through all the trouble to bring it to me :') awwwh . am I lucky? or am I just luck? Hahah I'm messing w ya' . Tried some and they tasted so good:) Too bad I vomited like everything I ate after that :S Sorry guise. This thing is getting worse by the way. Hopefully I'll get a PROPER check up. For now fingers crossed cause I don't wanna be spending christmas in a hospital again. Grr.

You happy? Cause I'm not.

It's funny how people are so freaking judgemental these days. They can judge you without even hearing both sides of the story. I hate those people and the ones that actually believed them. Yeah , I hate them more. I loathe you entirely. Everyone has a limit. And from what I see she just reached hers. Mum , you're the strongest person I known , ever . Sure , there are people fighting for cancer out there. Kids starving in africa. But in my eyes. I think she's the strongest person I've known. I'm not gonna lie , I've been a rebel. Even now , sometimes. But I guess it just came out of anger. I know I don't really mean it. So I'm not gonna say no anymore. I'm willingly gonna go where ever you want to bring me. I'm gonna do whatever you want me to do. I am paying my dues. As much as you like saying we're going away and never coming back but do nothing about it. I have a strong feeling that this time , you meant what you say. And to my dearest grandma , you've won. We're leaving. We're not just gonna sit here and take your bullshit anymore.

Dayum.

Because I know how this feels like. Today was horrible but at the same time great. Partly because I wasn't feeling entirely well. And well I got to see him which made me happy enough. Woke up at 7:50 , thanks leeann & darien for the wake up calls / text. Started feeling superrrr sick. Snoozed for about 10-15 minutes. Then finally got up and went on twitter. Leeann came over to take care of me. Thanks again:) Showered. When I was done , darien was in my living room already. Walked to ss2 mall , vomited on the way. Met up w mr jordan freestylez. Or god knows what his name is. He made us walk here and there. And I guess he was too 'shy' so he texted us when he can just talk to us-.- WOW . LOL. Too much money to spend la he. Stayed at the side of the road because I wasnt feeling well again. After awhile we walked to his apartment. Wait for him to go change. LOL. Then his dad came pick us up and fetched us to ou:) Bought tickets. Waited for eugene to come. Watched movie. Stare at some girl that is supposingly be a statue. LOLOL She looked freaking gorgeous but people were like laughing at her for some reason-.- HAHA. Wanted to bring him to the secret garden but theres something wrong with the buttons in the lift so we didnt go. But we went to the baseball place instead:) MAH BOI PLAYS LIKE A BAWS (Y) Uh uh . Took so long to decide if we should go to curve or not. Finally went , walked under the rain. Spent more money in curve. LOL. And had dinner then came home. I guess you could say that's almost EVERY detail of how my day went. Will be spamming bout some shiz tmrw. Goodbye & Goodnight:)

Girly background , YAY:D

Ayeee. Noticed my background is not black anymore? Well I changed it. HAHA. It took me so long to find something that actually matches -.- Gonna leave it like this for awhile. Embrace the girly-ness because I can:D Anyways leeann johnson and darien came over today:) Was supposed to take some kind of 'group photo' but idk what happened. We ended up just rotting instead. Basically talk about ou the whole time. And some dude name jordan. He's fetching us out tmrw I guess. Gonna ask my mum for some money later so wish me luck. That's all ! Thanks for reading.

An average day.

These are the only words I'm saying in my head. I was having trouble falling asleep last night. Not only that , I was also in a super bad mood due to pms. LOL. So errrrrybody reading this. Don't mess with me on my period. Like seriously. Ask my friends. Haha. Woke up hella early for some reason and I don't know why. But I woke up in a great mood and I didn't really care that my charger wasn't in my room. Usually I'll be all tired and lazy. And usually if my charger is gone , I'll freak and scold people and stuff because I clearly need to charge my phone every morning. Cause it dies when I'm asleep. But I'm kinda hyper today. I got up played some old songs in my spare phone & started dancing. Gosh I missed dancing so much. Anyways the rest of the day was a really boring day. All I did was sit at home and rot and rot and rot. Fight for the charger. Took care of daddy. And mummy made me wait the whole freaking day cause she promised she'll take me out. Ended up going out at 8 , I was so pissed. But I'll talk about that some other time when I'm angry enough to let everything out. Went to curve did some grocery shopping , and that's it. Oh yeah , I also learnt some tutting & C walking today:) The tutting , It's on the right of this blog. Go have a look :D

RANT.

First of all , fuck you mum:) FUCK YOU. F-U-C-K-Y-O-U. Just because you're in a bad mood and I was the only the person in the living room gives you no right to fucking lecture me. Everything you scold me about is the same thing over and over again. Really mum ? Are you for real now? Just cause you can't find any more reasons to scold me you use the same one over and over again. Well fuck it. I'm sick of everything. I just want out. I wanna be out of this fucking hell. During school days I sleep late you go all "mae, holidays almost here already , on the holidays only sleep late can or not?" I listened. And now you're saying " mae , you're always sleeping late " BITCH WHAT THE FUCK? I quoted what you said and you go speechless and find something else to scold me. In the middle of a argument my friend called and asked if I could go to her competition. Of course I had to , shes my bestfriend. Let me tell you guys what my mum said. " What for? You're doing all these NONSENSE with your friends" Nonsense? NONSENSE? You asked what am I gonna do there. I said SUPPORT. THAT AIN'T NONSENSE NOW , IS IT? HUH? Mum you wanna know the fucking definition of nonsense?! LOOK AT JUSTYNE. OR KOKOH. IDK. That's nonsense. Lazing around the fucking house all day and night. While I a fucking fourteen year old teen look for a fucking job. But of course I can't do much because I'M FUCKING FOURTEEN! Maybe next year. I'll have more choices to choose from. And I'll have a part time whether you like it or not. Okay hmm what else. "Mae , stop being a follower and go find something to do , what happened to cheer?" Mm , mum. You're the one that clearly have no fucking hope in me to join cheer. When I wanted to buy stuff for cheer. You go all " for what? it's not like you finish anything" Do you still think I wanna join after hearing MY OWN MUM say that? No. Obviously not. So I said , you have no hope for me to join. So why should I bother continue. You had no comment once again. Now you bring up the piano and the guitar lessons. Well I'm sorry mum that i have no interest for something you FORCED me to learn. and the guitar lessons ? I'm not even taking them , that's kokoh. So why don't you give me a fucking break and scold him instead? Is it cause I'm the only girl and I HAVE TO be the one that HAS TO be PERFECT in EVERYTHING? Yeah thats right. That's not it , there's still more. "Name something that you didnt give up on mae" DANCING MUM. DANCING, THATS ONE THING I NEVER GAVE UP ON. YOU KNOW WHY I STOPPED? BECAUSE MY TEACHER IS ON A FUCKING TOUR CAUSE HE HAS FUCKING COMPETITIONS ALL AROUND THE WORLD . I just want out. Why can't you listen to me , just once.

My christmas wish:)

I don't have the words to articulate this particular thought at this time.

But here's my letter to santa.

Dear Santa (I'm way old to believe you exist but yeah I'm writing this letter anyways) ,

I’m not asking for a phone, or an i-pod, or beats. I don’t want a puppy or a kitten. Clothes mean nothing to me. I’m not asking for a lot this year, I never really do. But this year I am asking for something. And I guess you can consider it to be a hassle to make. Please tell the elves I said sorry. But this year, all I want for Christmas is to be happy. I want a mom who wont be busy at work 24/7 to have time with me. A brother that doesn't just lay around in the room all day and doesn't help out. A grandmother who decides to ruin everyone's day by just stopping by. I just want a family that will sit in the living room/ dinner table and have a nice talk. Or who will play games together like how it was back when all my aunts and uncle lived here. I want to be able to run to my mom crying, instead of run from her crying. I want a night without yelling. A day without fighting. I want to love being at home. I want to come to this place and feel safe, instead of always trying to find a way out of it. I just want a happy family. That would make me happy. I hope thats not too much to ask for. I hope that fits under the tree. Xo , A little girl, who just wants to be happy.

I LOVE YOU BABY:)

Nyehehe. This is a replacement for our webcam kisses cause I'm too shy to do it infront of you. But here you go baby <3 I love you so so much! <3 I bet you have the largest widest most sexiest smile on your face right now , you're welcome boo :) x

kind of depressed.

Today was just amazing. Walked around. Watched arthurs christmas (the show is a big nono) Cuddled. It was all so perfect. There were sparks when we kissed and everything :') <3 But of course a perfect day had to be ruined. I'm feeling so guilty right now. That his mum and him are arguing , or whatnot. She probably think of me as a slut. A bad influence, I don't know. Gosh.

100th freaking post C:

Yipeeeeeee! I've just reached my 100th post readers. In 3-4 months time. Whoah. Imagine if I continued blogging till next year. Which most probably I won't cause no one reads this shit anyways. All the useless stuff I blogged :O HAHA. I've been mia lately and I had nothing much to blog about so that's that. Anyways , Recently I went out w huihui , jason , bookean , darien & johnson. It was okaay , for me. But idk for the rest off them la. Wanted to rock climb but we didn't have any 'adult supervision' or whatever. After zat. Darien and johnson slept over in my place for 2 days._. Dyed their hair. Jam to songs. Talk about random stuff. The usual. Speaking of that , they should really start leaving spare stuff in my house. LOLOLOL. Oh hell yeah guess vart? I'm gonna see my boo tomorrow :] Like finally after uhh 11 days. Omg. 11 days felt so long. I'll be in his arms tomorrow :> hehehehohoho. Can't waitttttt. Haven't picked out what I'm gonna wear though ._. Super excited. Will blog about it next time I guess?:) Lastly , dear pimples please go away , you're always coming out when I haz a date. Like seriously?-.-

Pathetic posts.

My mum never fails to make me feel like crap all day , everyday. But I guess she just wants the best for me. But how am I supposed to change or do what she wants if she doesn't let me. For example. Example #1 She says I don't help out in the house. The moment I pick up the plate and start to wash it she says nevermind , let the maid do it. So I stop insisting then she says I don't bother helping. Example #2 , you should do something productive instead of staying in the house and using the computer the whole day. Umm excuse me? Were you at home? No. I just on my laptop when you got home. I did not use it for the whole day. Example #3 , Why dont you join some clubs or stuff. so in case you can't get a job you can use your talent. Okay so , I love to sing and dance , I think everyone knows that. Can I go for classes , mum? No. Example #4 , Why can't you be like your cousins? Straight A's all the way. Well , I'm sorry I'm not smart. I'm sorry I couldn't reach your standards. I'm sorry you won't let me go to tuitions. There's way more but I'll just stop here.

Bye uncle mhel :C

So my uncle just left :/ Right after I went downstairs after bathing. I missed the chance to say goodbye to him. I hope we meet again soon. I'm gonna miss you like hell. No more late night suppers w you. No more asking for transport to go here and there. No more teasing me when I have a boyfriend. No more having the person that thinks every guy that I go out with is my boyfriend. No more going to kl. No more introducing games. No more tickle fights or pranks. It all ends here. 5 years you've been here. What would it be like when you leave. Sigh. Actually teared up writing this. I just wanna wish all the best to you , aunty dolly , miley & mhelaine. Take care of my shop till I get back there. Hope the business is good. God bless. Lotsa love , mae.

Being a spoilt brat.

Mum , what the fuck did I do to make you hate me so bad? Huh? I said I wanna work. So I won't have to be asking money from you all the time. Don't you want that? It's all you ever complain about - money. I only will be working for 2 days so calm your fucking tits. It's not even a 24 hour work. I'll be gone for 5 hours at least. You're always like look at this kids blahblahblah. So young working blahblahblah. Helping their parents blahblahblah. Am I not? Why can't you just fucking hear me out. Ugh. I found my own transport and everything so it would be easier but just because I'm following a guy's car you freaked out. I'll give you every fucking detail you need from him. I told you his name. I'll get his fucking number for you. I can even call him to ask his mum talk to you , whatever makes you satisfied. I'll fucking do it. But no. And when I tell you leeann will be there too , you don't believe me. Since when did I ever lie to you huh? Maybe last year , I did a few times. But I changed, when will you realize that? Never. Done w this.

He's having doubts.

Being in love is hard. You’re gonna end up fighting more than half the time, then the next like nothing ever happened at all. Spending one moment crying yourself to sleep, then the next non-stop laughter. Then full of frustration, next filled with joy. Some moments talking about what great future you two have planned ahead, then the next with no future at all. When you feel like you’ve completely given up, but you can’t let go. Half the time you’re so damn sure of what it is then the next you just absolutely have no clue anymore. Half of us will pretend like it’s the perfect little thing. But really, it’s the most unperfect thing there could ever be.

wake up > survive > sleep.

HAHAHAHAHA. Omg the second picture , I totally got it like once I read it. Incase you're wondering , it's a bad word. Lol. Missing php and everyone there:( So I went to curve today. Wore the dress my mum bought during chinese new year and only wore a few times , so I decided to wear it today:D It's kinda short and tight now though. Kind of. Bro said I gain weight and everyone else said I lost weight. Le sigh. I'm already thin enough wtf. Gonna have to eat more again. No more skipping meals. Saw him today , we spent like 15 minutes together I guess. But it was okay , it made my day :) That's how today went! LOLBYE.

ZeCarnival:]

Yup , pretty much meee:D Hahaha. Hi again readurs <3 Mia weih seriously . Anyways I'm here now to update y'all about what's going on lately:) Today.. I woke up at 7;30 am then I went to wash my face and brush my teeth and then choose my clothes and bath. LOLJK. But no , seriously. After I got ready I waited like almost 45 minutes for my uncle to get ready and eat. And the ride to the place I was suppose to go was a disaster. I swear I almost died in the car. Finally reached. Saw him <3 Hohohoho :v He's way cuter in person btw. Be jelez , bitchez. Lol. Met his sister , cousins and friend:) They're really friendly c: Didn't really do much because the place was surrounded by kids. Mostly ang mo's like my boyfriend loves to state out. He has a thing for them. LOLOLOL. So pretty and so dur hensem. *Envy* And the school , omg it's hella huge. 10x bigger then tamansea. HAHAH. Walked to mcd and had a drink and thennnnnn walk halfway back. His mum picked us up and fetch us to sunway pyramid :D - awkward ride - Walked around , talked , held hands , hugged , kissed and ateeeee <3 (which reminds me , thank you oh so wonderful boyfriend of mine that fought me to pay the bill , I love you so much) It sounds pretty plain. But it was so great:) Wish you stayed a little longer though. Ah well , don't blame you :) <3

SPOILERS.

LALALALA. Hi bloggers/readers. Have you guys watched the movie 'shutter'? LOL. If no , I'm here to spoil it for you when you do:) This movie storyline is about this guy , his current girlfriend & his ex. Which of course I won't be putting up the picture cause its hella scary and i'm alone at the living room atm. So yeah. Go search yourself. This guy , he's a photographer. Named tun. Or something like that. K so it started like this. He was out w his highschool friends and his current girlfriend. They went to get some drinks(beer) After zat. They drove home and hit some random girl which is apparently tun's ex. She started haunting them after that night. It started w shadows in pictures that tun took. Then it got worse and worst. So his girlfriend became all scared and stuff. They went to talk to those people that experience shit like these. The person told the both of them to get a poloriod and take pictures of the ghost. So they did. Skip skip skip. Tun's highschool friends that I was talking about earlier commited suicide one by one. Tun's girlfriend wanted to "investigate" or smth. So she went to the school tun took pictures at, found out tun and the girl they hit was the same person. blah blah blahh. Now im lazy to tell-.- So go watch la. It's scary:OOO Moral of the story: Don't fuck around w yr exes. They might haunt you when you're dead. LOL K BYE , for now:)

BLACK&YELLOW.

I wake up every evening, with a big smile on my face And it never feels out of place:) Bonjour readers , haven't been blogging much P: I'm too "occupied" w facebook , twitter & him. HAHAHA. Anyways I'm back now:) Just wanna congratulate harimau malaysia for the match yesterday ! Indo , better luck next time;) WOOHOO MALAYSIA BOLEHHH <3 So semangat :') HAHAHAHA.

el oh el.

kaykaykay , so this is louis

and this is my boo <3

HAHAHA omg , their pose (Y) nyehehehe. Looks like they are having headaches though. But that smile , ohmygod <3 Anyways , I finally got something to blog about yo:P Was listening to simple plan - your love is just a lie earlier. It's kinda sad la._. for those people out there that wonders why I don't really trust people. This post is for you:) Look around , what are we surrounded by? cheaters , liars , betrayers etc . you get it? we're surrounded by fucked up things/people. and some people actually get tired of being hurt.I can't trust everyone out there because once i let my guards down , you'll just leave. But there are some exceptions. Those are my bestfriends:) And I hope they won't be like the rest of them that decided to abandon me. Thanks for sticking around.I love every single one of you:)

Finally happy:)

Ohmygosh. He has the most gorgeous eyes ever <3 The plans I had today "Backfired" Lol. I thought I was really gonna meet him but nooo :( Last night's "skype date" was :') <3 Hope I get to go out later , anywhere. As long as I'm not at home. Even the freaking park would do. LOL. K bye. I realized ever since the holiday. I dont really have things to blog about-.-

PAPOIIII.

Hye mai unic0rnz readurs!!!! :D Lol I have no idea why i'm spelling like that. Pretending to be jenny :3 Anyways , Guess vart? I didn't get to go to cheer today:'( Because we got no transport back. And I didn't go shopping w momzie and aunty jhoy cause I thought I was going cheer. Now I'm at home and I have nothing to do and I'm starving. This is so far the most boring holiday ever , and I'm not even joking. I need to find something productive to do asap. A job , maybe. Alright that's it for now. Bye!:)

I constantly tell myself “I’m done” but then I find myself trying again.

I'm not gonna mess up on this guy , because he's a keeper <3 :) My bestfriend reminded me about this a few days ago. "Be contented with your boyfriend/girlfriend. Yes, there are people who are greater than him/her. There are people who are more attractive, more intelligent, more caring, and more fortunate. That’s life - full of temptations. But don’t be deceived by those things. Because didn’t you ever realize that there are people who are also greater than you? Yet, he/she chose you." Just wanna share this with everyone out there that are having second thoughts. Anyways , today is like the first day in the holiday that I went out. HAHAHA omg just realized that. Spent the whole day w my homies in sunway club instead of a sleepover. Well I guess that works too. Couldn't swim so I just watched them. Did a little cheer stunts and took some pictures. Oh and cheer tomorrow:) I hope leeann's going:3

You're great. I just hope you're not like them.

HAHAHAHAHA. THAT'S SO CUTE. LOL. (Notbeingasickass,I'mjustopenminded) Wanted to go out today but I failed at sleeping early last night so I failed at waking up early too. Going to renee's place tomorrow. She said something about playing something but I have no idea what she's talking about so I guess we have to wait and see :D Till then , bye blogger:3

My parents.

I've been wanting to post something bout my parents but I always forget to. This was few days ago but yeah , I hate watching my mum cry and that I cannot do anything about it. I'll feel all guilty and stuff. Do you know we tend to take our parents for granted? Saying they’re annoying because they won’t let you do this and that. Wishing they were gone so you’re free. Think about this, your parents give you everything you want, they work their ass off to put a roof over your head, feed you, and basically to see you happy, but what are you doing for them? Nothing. So, stop complaining, and arguing with them, sit down, and take their bullshit without replying back to them. What if your parents passed away? I know I’d be devastated, I’m sure you all would be to. I suggest you stop taking them for granted, stop looking at what you don’t have, and start appreciating what you do have.

UGH. HUNGRYYYY:'(

It's almost 7 PM. And I haven't had anything to eat since yesterday. Weak & Grumpy as hell. Kill me now. Not going for cheer practice later on. Leeann's sick. Renee's leg hurts. And I don't know about me. Gonna go hunt for something to eat now. Bye!

curiosity killed the cat.

Me on the weekends and on holidays . I'm just too lazy to do anything. HAHAHA. Anyways , renee and leeann came over today:) Didn't really do much just sit around and chilled played some bubbles , I know it sounds retarded but yeah . Bathed when they went to the park with jim. Tried doing the marble nails but super fail. Wasted so much time and nail polish-.- LOL. Nothing much to blog about today. Gonna go skype with a retard now. Byeeeeeee! :) Oh and , cheer tmrw. WOOHOO. I'm nervous.

Nobody wants to be alone in the world.

Do you ever feel like breaking down and crying ? Letting every single thing that's bothering you out? I have. Ugh what am I saying? I gotta stop being such a emo fuck again. This morning. I had the urge to cut. For some personal reasons. But I'm still trying to stop the urge from cutting. (last time I cut was about 1 year ago , proud of myself that I was willing to stop) I miss how easy life was when we were kids. I miss watching cartoons in my pj's all day long and not worry about anything. Not that we're not now but yeah. It's different.I miss how I was close to both of my parents when we're on vacation. The on vacations part? How to say ah. Because they're always to be busy to have time for us so yeah. I feel so weak now a days too. Like physically. No idea what's up with me. I should stop doing alot of things not only stop being a emo fuck but also stop going online for way too long and just fucking stare at the screen. Sleeping at 7 every night and waking up late in the afternoon. Having just ONE meal in one day. That's not how I'm gonna be spending my whole holiday but it already seem like it now. Thinking should I continue to go cheer or not. Decisions , decisions. It's like cheer is the only way to help me bond with my bestfriends again. And that alone means alot to me. Other than that , I have something to do during this boring holiday.

Legit.

This goes to all the form 5's out there! Good Luck for your spm. All the best!:)

My efforts weren’t enough, so I stopped trying.

Yes, the movie sucks. The actor/actress suck too according to most people. ( No , not me ) But I'm still watching it anyway. Team jacob forever & always:) Yay. Uh so yeah , I'm supposed to be in the curve right now. But I overslept. As usual and I didn't have any transport so I guess I'll be going tomorrow and get them brownies <3 Noooom. Last night , I was thinking about how my mum is really struggling to make us (my bros & I ) happy. And I thought to myself. I shouldn't be asking for so much. I don't feel the need to be in cheer. Sure, It's a hobby yeah. Eventually , I'll get bored of it and probably find new interest. Which is what normally happens most of the time. But I don't know , it's complicated. Yes , I have two parents. But my dad isn't really working anymore. So it's more like a single parent feeling thing. I don't really know how to put this to words but I'm trying. And uhm , I had this talk with my maid / aunty just now. And we were talking about the strangest topic. There was boyfriends. Ghost. Studies. Vampires. Witches. My mum. All those lah. It was really great. I mean having someone to talk to about this every now and then. I know I had alot to blog about today but when I finally touched the com and go on blogger. Poof. Nothing else to say.

11.11.11

First thing's first. 11.11.11 11:11 pm - wished:)

Fingers crossed that it will come true. K sooo , I learnt how to do a super cool tongue trick in the shower today. It's called a 3 leaf clover? Yeah , go search it. I can't seem to do a proper one after my bath. But I'll work on that. Hahaha. Cool things happen in showers yo. And then I watched some tutorial vids after that. The way they explained was hella confusing. So I just practiced infront my photobooth. Yay photobooth! Left the house around 4-5. Then took like 2 fuhreaking hours to find the motherfucking hotel. The roads in kl are fucking complicated. I won't go there when I can drive if I'm alone. I'd rather take the lrt or smth. Lol. By the time we reached , I can't even feel my legs. No joke. All of us squished in a small car. And I was having a major stomach ache then. But the food , mailord. It was amazing. Yuuuuuumeh in my tummeh. There were more desserts than food actually but still , awesome. Gonna go there again after 19 days. Momzie's birthday:) Countdownnnn. Once again happy birthday justin & uncle mhel:) To everyone else , happy 11.11.11 <3

Move along.

Everybody experiences hurt whether it be due to family problems, friend problems, relationship problems, etc. It’s all part of life. Of course some people experience more hurt than others, but nevertheless, pain is pain. The way I see it, we have two options. You can spend every second of every day being depressed over whatever caused it. You can be miserable, you can cry, you can self inflict yourself, and you can allow that hurt to penetrate the weak spot in your heart. But ask yourself what good does any of this do for you? Don’t make yourself suffer like that when you can do the exact opposite. Smile, be happy, block that pain out, and think about all the positives in your life. Think about others who have it much worse than you. Life is short, but it also offers many chances. Don’t waste too much time being sad.

Cheer #2.

Yay for random gifs:) Helloooooo readers. I'm having a super terrible tummy muscle ache right now. But cheer was definitely worth it. (No Leeann , I have not found my new interest) I just think it's really fun. The experience was super scary. Because you have to fully trust your supporters when they lift you up and bring you down etc. The first few tries was hella scary. Not because it was high but because I feel so totally out of balance. After awhile , you eventually get the hang of it. So anyone out there that's thinking to join. GOOOOO:D Hahaha. The stretching part was awful cause I'm not THAT flexible so yeah. And I HATE the running the most. LOL. Even though it was just 3 rounds. The people there are super kind :) Ohyeah! Then there's all the strength work for the base. And stretching for the flyers. Gonna do a cradle on the next class, Wish us luck. Curse you bananas & supermans. Stomach hurts bad now.